MUET

MUET. Mine is on the July session.

Why should I be the one who bears all the mistakes? I'm tired of all of these. You must be wondering why...

You know MUET? It's Malaysian University English Test. Yeah, I haven't sit for it even though I'm already in the final year of university.

You see, my brother too sit for MUET this year. Yes, with me. At the same school. Our previous school. I know I am the one to blame, cause I delay in registering for that damn thing. But why is everybody angry with me? That brother of mine did the same thing too. He delayed his registration too. But why he's not being yell at? Because he's your dear, Mom? What about me, then? Somebody else's shit?

My mom suddenly yell at me just because I procrastinate. I know I'm a lady now, but you see, I'm not the kind of a girl that just accept what people throw at me. I still think I'm immature. Still lots to learn. But why so serious? I just don't like that. I'm just hoping that my parents be nice when asking about or ordering about that doesn't concern their future. She's mad at me like I'm doing something horrible. My father too blame me for what just happened. "You shouldn't do this!""Why are you behaving like this?""If you don't wanna do it, just tell me earlier, I can save my money!!"etc...

That makes me thinking, should I do something bad? The outcome will be the same anyway - being yell at.

I just registered for MUET just now. We are going to sit for it this July. I hope I can get off day for it. I'm starting my practical next Monday.

P/S: All of the things that happened in my life makes me stronger and more stubborn. I tend to solve problems with silence. Silence is virtue, right? I don't like being a girlish lady, but rather be a wise one. I don't like being a grown-up, but being a girl forever will not get you anywhere. Just let me be me, procrastinate and all, because I can only process info slowly, but I'll get there in time.

P P/s: Please understand me MORE, my dear parents. I can hate people easily, I know I have no place to say this but I am sure you don't understand me well, because I feel abandoned at times. I always try to understand your thoughts and feelings even though it's not very clear or I force my way through it. I'm not fine being hated, and I know you scold me to teach me, but please refrain using that fucking-sarcasm-cursing words that you forbid us to use.


Good night, my readers. To friends who read this, thank you for being a caring friend. Salam to you.