Hating someone again

It has been a while since my last post.

And Yes, as this post title, I'm hating someone again. This time, it's my brother. There are problems with his attitude. No respect for me, and I'm being looked down. Why? Because I'm childish? Because I'm silly, irrelevant? He's no different, either.

Just now, I ask him to put back things he used. I'm just asking him POLITELY! And he' saying '"SHUT UP!" to me! TO ME! How dare he! Who is he to say SHUT UP to me? He has no right! He is just my little brother! He is going too far.

And my mother too, why is she ignoring what that boy done to me? Am I someone who are not important in this family? I bet they won't feel sad once I'm dead.

Maybe some of you feel that he was just saying that, casually. But you know, he always verbally attacking me. Yes, I know I'm not that quick witted like my brother, in fact I'm slow on thinking of serious matters. But I don't understand why he dare to ignore me like I'm nobody to him?

Maybe because I have many failures in my life? I mentioned this before in previous posts. Yes, I admit that I failed many times. But I learning from my mistakes, even though it's hard.

All I hope is a place in this house. A respect for me. I have a pride too. I'm not a stone. I have feelings. I pretend to not care on hurtful things about myself, because I really don't want to mess things up.Other people say bad things behind my back, I don't want my own family do the same to me.

p/s: I'm not being selfish.